I orignally wrote these words for Kidspot, but the thoughts and feelings I touched on in this post have been on my heart and mind this week, so it seemed appropriate to it share here today…
In the nine years Reubs and I have been together we have lived in three cities, two large coastal towns and one tiny rural village. We’ve occupied four houses and six apartments (not to mention the three months we spent staying with my mum between moves). In that time I’ve worked in publishing, communications, hospitality and retail, as well as in my current position, self-employed with a little handmade jewellery business and bits of freelance writing.
I’ve always thought I was just one of those people who thrived on change. But while it’s true I do love exploring new places and experiencing new things, I’ve recently come to realise that perhaps more than I enjoy new things, I like leaving old things behind. In other words, I’m quite good at running away. In the past when things have gotten tough, boring or unhappy, instead of making some changes to make my existing circumstances work for me, I’ve just picked up and left it all behind. I don’t regret doing this, as all my experiences have taught me valuable lessons and made me the person I am today, but I see now that I can’t uproot my life and start afresh forever.
The reality is life is never perfect. There will always be struggles and room for improvement in various aspects of our existence. While I don’t for a moment condone settling for a life that makes you miserable, I believe the key to happiness is not making life perfect, but rather making the best of whatever we have, where ever we are. To bloom where we are planted.
I am mostly pretty content with the state of my world right now but there are certainly areas I’m not crazy about. Sometimes I get frustrated with the limitations of the tiny village we live in and I’m not thrilled with the state of our old house, but instead of giving in to the urge to run away in pursuit of greener pastures (as I would have in times gone by) I am learning to focus on the good bits and make smaller changes in the areas I’m not happy with.
I may not be smitten with the town we live in, but if we hadn’t moved here we couldn’t have afforded to buy our first home and we certainly couldn’t have afforded for me to quit my day job and start a business. In making some compromises on where we live we have been able to make other dreams come true. There isn’t a decent coffee shop for miles and we are quite a distance from most of our friends here, but it is safe and friendly and peaceful. Our house is shabby and in need of so much work, but it is ours. We have room for a veggie patch, we can have a big family of pets here without upsetting a landlord, and our mortgage repayments are less than we were previously spending on rent.
Our life is not without flaws but there is plenty to be grateful for. Rather than using the imperfect bits as reasons to run away, I’m trying to use them as motivation to improve and make the most of where we are right now.
I believe that it is important to take risks and make changes, and I am so glad I have taken some fairly big leaps in my life, but I know now that I’ll never be truly happy if I keep leaping without ever pausing to embrace where I have landed. There comes a time when you have to stop running and just breathe. Little by little I’m learning to make the most of the here and now. In this moment I am planted in this creaky old house and this funny little town, so here I will bloom.